Today she writes in her own words of that loss. . .'T HERE are moments in life you never forget and I've just experienced one of them. I stood with a mother and father in their darkest hour as they identified the body of their young son in the middle of the night. He had died in a car accident an hour-and-a-half earlier.

Suddenly, tragically, unbelievably. The disbelief we felt as we looked at this young man is hard to put into words. You want to press the rewind button of life to the couple of hours earlier when he was still alive. You want to put the pieces of his body back together and make him whole again. Let's go back in time, God, and make it better.

"Earlier that evening, he had come home, threw his bag in the hall and greeted his family. As Mum and Dad were heading out for an evening, she gave him a little kiss and said 'see you tomorrow'. She did see him the next day. She saw him a few short hours later, but not the way a mother should see her son.

"The moment was even more poignant because of his brightness, his handsomeness, his friendliness and his job. In his uniform, as an Air Corps cadet, he looked like a Hollywood movie star. A great young man, a good living young man, with a great future. Wasted.

Unnecessary. Preventable.

"The news reports said 40 had died on the roads in January alone. He is not just another statistic and neither are any one of the others. He was and still is a much loved person who will never ever be forgotten.

The human story behind the death of each of those people is touching, and extremely sad. Each death has been deeply felt by their shocked loved ones. Each one remembered, loved and grieved for.

"It is said that if everyone slowed down five or six kilometres an hour, it would reduce deaths. If everyone did a little bit and not leave it to a few to do something big. Will 40 more people be missing from the table by the end of February? I hope not. Loss of life on the road is increased by the same old things we've been nagged about for years . . . speed, drink and seatbelts.

"All the talk won't bring Tom back. It won't bring back his young friend Robert Lineen, who was born on the same day and died on the same day. They were both back-seat passengers in the car.

"Last Monday hundreds of people filled St Carthage's church in Lismore for two separate burials. Not a single person was left untouched. I stood to one side and cried for the parents, brothers and sisters. The pain of their loss, the emptiness they feel and will always feel, will stay with me forever.

"You wake up in the middle of the night and sleep doesn't come again.

Another day of the pain of loss begins."