Companies continue to outsource cushy jobs to countries where people are willing to work longer hours for less pay. The dogma of shareholder value continually forces managers to downsize and rationalise . . . which usually translates into getting rid of the guy at the next desk, and asking you to do his job during your lunch.

Still, all hope is not lost for the slackers among us. If you want a job that will be secure for life, become a tax break.

In a global economy becoming ever more competitive, big companies and business tycoons are still forced to pay vast amounts of tax. And they don't like it very much. Along with teams of lawyers and accountants, they are constantly looking for ways to reduce their tax bill.

Position yourself as a tax write-off, and suddenly you are transformed from an irritating cost to be avoided into a deductible expense to be cherished. Certain industries exist not to make money in themselves, but to create losses that can be offset against profit elsewhere.

You could start with a sports team.

The European football industry creates losses for a few wealthy men.

Russian oil baron Roman Abramovich has spent a fortune on Chelsea. Last year, the club had a loss before tax of £140m ( 200m). Not much chance of that business coughing up any taxes to the UK Treasury.

You know nothing about soccer? It doesn't matter if you aren't David Beckham, or the only thing you can kick is the cat. There are plenty of jobs in the marketing department.

There are other sports to try as well. A Formula One motor racing team will happily scorch its way through millions of dollars without ever making a profit. Indeed, the category of 'fun but ludicrously unprofitable' is a big one. How about a fashion house? That could dispose of millions in the rustle of a hemline. So could a vineyard or a luxury hotel.

Then there is film. This month, Gordon Brown offered new tax breaks to encourage film-makers, having closed down earlier deductions because the write-offs were misused.

Actors will no doubt be celebrating all over London. Nor should we forget the media. A magazine or newspaper can eat money.

You don't have to be in one of the frivolous industries to secure your niche in the tax-reduction game. Take private equity, a profitable industry for a generation of financiers. When a buy-out firm purchases a company, it immediately gets rid of the equity, and saddles the business with massive borrowing, the interest payments on which can be deducted from your tax bill. Indeed, without the opportunities for tax reduction it creates, the private equity industry probably wouldn't exist.

Then there are hedge funds. Why are most of them based in the smaller Caribbean islands, or in places such as Guernsey, or Luxembourg? It certainly doesn't have anything to do with increasing the tax bills of managers or investors.

If that doesn't work, how about the mergers and acquisitions business?

Any takeover deal offers a complex maze of tax breaks to hide behind. For example, Spanish companies can write off some of the cost of a foreign takeover. Work for a firm that has been bought by some Spaniards, and they will be so pleased with all the tax savings, they won't notice that you aren't doing anything all day.

Life as a tax break has one advantage over any other line of work.

You will never have to worry about boosting sales, beating competition, or making a margin. Nobody will hassle you to increase shareholder value . . . because they aren't worried about it. Just by checking into the office, and costing money, you have more than fulfilled your obligations.

And why is being a write-off so safe? The one thing you can be certain will never be abolished is tax. And as long as people want to reduce the amount of money they owe to the government, you will be completely secure.