It's a veritable phenomenon . . . but what the hell is it? HSM is a cheesy, old school, allsinging, all-dancing let'sdo-the-show-right-here melodrama, starring a bunch of tweenie superstars you've never heard of, complete with choreography from Dirty Dancing veteran Kenny Ortega. Our nine year old . . .that would be your key demographic right there . . .is absolutely besotted.

We bought her the CD, and now I can sing all the songs for you, too. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to put my head in the oven.