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'If Mother Teresa was still alive today she could have set up the Sainted Ladyboys of Charity'
Neil Francis Rugby analyst



WHAT has four legs and an arm? A happy and contented Pit Bull Terrier. It's the best thing I can think of to describe what happened last Sunday, it's very hard to do anything when Salem's Lot are exercising their incisors on a part of your body.

Whether they turned up to play or not, Leinster couldn't play. They were so meek after the final whistle that they could scarcely ask for their arm back. Leinster's Heineken Cup challenge? The meek shall inherit the earth . . .if that's alright with you.

I got a bad dose of the state pathologist's blues after the game. If there is a body lying in a ditch on Monday morning you can't ignore it.

You have to dissect no matter how unpleasant. The anatomy of this loss is no less unpleasant.

The geographical spread in the province of Leinster is quite diverse . . . Wexford people (Gordon D'Arcy) and, say, Louth people (Robert Kearney) are very different from each other . . . people from the pale are different again and then there are the Dubs. Last Sunday we found out an awful lot about ourselves, stuff that we already knew, things that we suspected but preferred to allay or suspend.

Can Dublin people cheer or support their own? Of course they can. I have often stood on the hill and shouted for the Dubs and wondered in amazement at the colour, humour, pageantry and noise of that section in Crokerf when they are winning.

I suppose the first element to supporting any team is to turn up. Judas apparently tried to give his 30 pieces of silver back when he realised what an awful fate awaited his master. If every Honorary Treasurer of every Leinster club realised what last Sunday had in store for their team would they have sold their allocation to the Munster corporates etc? I played 12 seasons for Leinster, I couldn't even get one terrace ticket. There were about 22,000 tickets issued to Leinster and the same issued to Munster. How come it was at least 70:30 in favour of Munster? So while we are on the biblical theme, if we are going to stone Leinster, let he or she who is without sin. . .

When you watch and analyse the video I try and put relevant perspective into how the match was won and lost. Two things stood out.

The unforced error count for Leinster was lamentable. The other thing . . . six points.

Leinster had a point scoring average of 36 in all of their Heineken games this season and a 27-point average in the Celtic league, so to drop their average by 30 points was singularly the most impressive aspect of their Chernobylic outing. It's easy enough to explain away if you look back at the unforced errors. Leinster committed eight class-A Marx Brothers mistakes in the nine minutes leading up to Denis Leamy's try. If Mother Teresa was still alive today she could have set up a new order, the Sainted Ladyboys of Charity.

Eight unforced errors in nine minutes, it's like the missionaries covering themselves in garnish and assuming the truss position as the cannibals knocked on the door. The first unforced error came four seconds after kick-off. I have previously discussed how weak Leinster's kick-off receptions were, I suppose Munster couldn't really exploit them because Leinster only had three in the match.

Let's talk about the one the whole nation saw, O'Gara's kick. Was it a good kick or a bad kick? It was a little to the left of the Leinster posts and about five metres outside their 22. Malcolm O'Kelly was the inside receiver standing three-quarter metres back from the 10 and inside the tramlines. You always have your strongest receiver in the inside position for obvious reasons. If Wayne Sleep and Bryce Williams were in Leinster's second row Wayne Sleep would be in the inside position.

The ball went where it was supposed to go, if Leinster caught it and held it, the feed to Contepomi and resultant kick to touch would net possession in the form of a line-out and good field position. The wind would ensure that Leinster's outhalf would not get the ball anywhere near their 10-yard line. That is what Munster were looking for, possession and good field position. They got an awful lot more.

For the uninitiated, the skill and judgement level required to accurately see down a high ball in a very blustery wind with a pack of mad dogs chasing is very high. O'Kelly had to sprint nearly 15 metres to where the ball was descending, there was no one marking the spot and nobody called for it. Selfless trooper that he is, O'Kelly put the call in, it was his ball, the sun didn't help him either. But he got to the drop-zone and readied to collect, his judgment was correct. As he was about to stick it in the bread basket he was taken out of it off the ball. But how could that happen, the Munster forwards were still snorting and chomping five or six metres away? Reggie Corrigan shunted into him and knocked him two feet off kilter. The loose head took his eye off his jumper to see where the chase was at and when he re-engaged he nudged his second row offline. How many times have these two played or practised together? The most basic error, a millisecond of a lapse, and Leinster never recovered. Munster would not leave without three and the knowledge that Leinster had left their balls in the dressing room.

Despite themselves, Leinster were still in the game up to the 76th minute.

That is more an indictment of Munster than their kissing cousins. For all Munster's caged aggression, street wisdom, time in possession, primal behaviour at the tackle zone, but most pertinently their concentration (Did they make a mistake in 80 minutes? ) it was a wonderfully selfcontained display except for one thing . . . a 10-point lead can become a four-point deficit in the space of 60 seconds. Munster couldn't put them away when they should have. The two late tries are conjecture, once Munster got the ball late in Leinster's half they could run the clock down handy. Two tries came, fair enough.

When you play with irresistible force and conviction the tide goes with you. It was open to interpretation whether Munster could lift their game higher if they had come under pressure from Leinster.

The Blues were scrabbling for a foothold of any kind in the first 15. A couple of phases to go through, a bit of relief or a score or two to get the board ticking. Things went Munster's way. David Wallace blatantly knocked on a minute or two before Leamy's try, Jutge played it on, a Leinster scrum in midfield was just what Leinster were looking for.

After Leamy's try Munster had a 10-0 lead. Leinster needed to get back at least on the scoreboard. Contepomi put up a nice cross-kick to Anthony Horgan for Denis Hickie to chase. Horgan caught it but was put to ground by Hickie who held his man, tried to get up and fight for the ball. Horgan simply got up and ran on. If you are tackled to the ground and held. You can't play the ball, it's a penalty. Munster cleared to the half way. Either way Contepomi was two for five on the day, no guarantees.

The 26th minute was crucial in terms of closing out the game. Leinster picked up a penalty between the 10 and the 22 on the left-hand side but Leamy and Contepomi had been fighting on the ground in exactly the same sector on Leinster's half of the field. The politics of niggle ruled, Munster are masters at it, a bit of chat, an inadvertent shove, a misdirected foot on your hand as you are getting up, a little push here, a pull back there, the ball gone but just a hint of late contact and a few words to boot . . . it's part of the game when you play Munster . . .

little things to rile you and provoke you. If you ignore it, they'll walk all over you, if you react the penalty normally goes to them for retaliation and a chorus of righteous indignation.

Concentration broken, job done.

If ever there was a person to target, it was Contepomi.

I'm not sure what happened but I would be surprised if Contempomi initiated the fight, penalty overturned and 30 yards back down the pitch and 16-3.

O'Gara played well on the day. He used the ball judiciously and never made a mistake. You would wonder how he would have done behind the Leinster pack.

Some of the mistakes he makes for Ireland he never makes for Munster.

We will talk more next week. There is plenty of unfinished to get through. For Leinster and their whole organisation there is much to ponder. This was a 'burn the boats, conquer or die' day.

When you absolutely have to win and this is the performance you get. I haven't been as disillusioned for a good while.

Most of the Leinster supporters I met on the day cheerily said "no complaints".

Tacit acceptance. That's the problem, there are no complaints. They were good enough to win the competition. They'll never get the opportunity again.




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