There's somebody taking the piss alright, but you get the feeling Cole's so immersed in his own little world he doesn't realise that he'd meet the guilty party if he walked into his bathroom and had a look in the mirror. Thank heavens, then, that the world of the average rugby professional isn't anything close to the stratosphere that the new Chelsea signing and his football buddies appear to inhabit.

The typical rugby wage, for the non-international at any rate, is somewhere round and about the 55,000-a-year mark (euro, not pounds remember) and there's an argument that they deserve a hell of a lot more for putting their body on the line on a regular basis. Not only do rugby players risk life and limb, literally, every time they cross the whitewash for a competitive fixture, they also show scant disregard for their own health during a couple of full contact training sessions every week. Despite the risks attached, most are simply happy to be making a living out of their passion, and getting a guaranteed pay cheque at the end of every month is almost a boon.

But there are those out there who don't even enjoy that assurance, the players who would almost swerve off the road with excitement, if the word 'contract' was mentioned by somebody at the other end of the phone, never mind any figure alongside it.

Meet the trialists, Irish rugby's newest genre of player. These guys are so keen to make a crust from the game they love they're essentially playing and training for the Irish provinces on a play-itby-ear basis. Connacht (for financial reasons) and Ulster (seemingly happy with their lot) are trialist-free zones at the moment, but Munster and Leinster are more than making up for that.

According to the IRFU, there are no hard and fast rules on trialists and the number each province can tag along at any one time. The only formal step required is that the Union are notified who the players actually are so they can be included on the Union's insurance policy.

The financial terms of the trial are entirely between the province and player . . . there are no Union guidelines whatsoever on payment.

Down in Munster there are at least two players on trial and while there could be a couple more, the province's management team aren't willing to let us in on the secret.

"We have a policy of not naming trialists, " says Munster manager Jerry Holland.

"There's enough pressure on these guys to succeed with their names being broadcast around the place." What we do know, from a process of elimination, is that James Downey, the former Connacht centre, and August Collins, a centre from New Zealand with two Samoan caps to his name, are currently attempting to impress Declan Kidney into placing a full-time contract in front of them.

Most observers would say that Downey has already done enough to secure a deal.

The 25-year-old was let go by Connacht at the end of last season because of his injuryprone nature, rather than his rugby-playing abilities, and he's already shown in a couple of Magners League games this season that his direct running style and abrasive physical presence at first centre fits in well with the Munster way of constructing a backline. Remember, Trevor Halstead is planning to either retire or head back to South Africa at the end of the current season and Downey certainly has the potential and ability to fill the former Springbok's boots. If he can stay clear of serious injury, that is.

Collins, meanwhile, is essentially vying for the same contract but bar one low-key run out in an 'A' game against Leinster in Roscrea a couple of weeks ago, his abilities, or lack thereof, remain under wraps.

At Leinster, they're a bit more open about who they have on trial. Fosi Pala'amo, the former Samoan prop, is skirting around the fringes of training . . . if that makes any sense for a 19-stone prop . . .

but the understanding is that he's going to be used on an emergency basis over the course of the season. It's like Brian O'Meara's return to Munster, his services will be utilised when all others are unavailable. James Donovan, an Australian back-rower who's just completed his medical studies, is another player training with the squad with a view to providing cover over the course of the season, but Andy Dunne and Michael Berne are two players keen to board the ship full-time.

Berne, a versatile centre known to both Michael Cheika and David Knox from Randwick, is going to be hanging around the place until the end of October at the very least, presumably to provide cover for the injured Gordon D'Arcy. Like Downey at Munster, Berne has looked good in a Leinster shirt this season and you'd imagine if Leinster can smuggle his clearance papers past the PAG, he'll be hanging around Donnybrook for a while.

Dunne's situation though seems a little less clear cut.

The 25-year-old is one of a number of young Irish outhalves who hasn't quite reached the standards expected of him, but he has more than enough time to set that record straight. Remember . . . and this also applies in the cases of Paddy Wallace and Jeremy Staunton . . . David Humphreys produced the best rugby of his career from the age of 28 onwards and Dunne is more than capable of maturing into a top-class out-half in the next couple of years. We'll watch his case with interest.

The key date for all players involved in this trial process is 28 September, the Heineken Cup registration deadline. This season teams in the competition can name 38 players in their squad, two more than last year, which would appear to give our trialists that little bit more hope than usual. The mitigating factor in all of this, however, is the return of the country's international players to frontline action. Over the course of this current weekend, and the two on the horizon, all of Ireland's top players will become available to their provinces, a situation which could push the likes of Downey, Dunne and Berne even further onto the professional rugby fringes.

If that happens, they could be the ones screaming that somebody is taking the piss.

ccronin@tribune. ie