So just now, with them stuck to the bottom of their league and with the last win a memory as distant as the war, it probably isn't the best time to be asking how they rate the chances of Keane doing well as their new manager.

"Look, I don't care about Roy Keane the manager, " says Duncan Harrison, who, from down the street, looked like a kindly old man in his mid-60s or so.

"Couldn't give a toss, like. As far as I can see, we could bring Alf bloody Ramsey here and he wouldn't be able to do anything with them useless bastards we have playing for us. Is Keane going to bring his boots? Is he? That's about the only useful thing he could do. No manager could sort this lot out. They should close down the whole bloody place."

Right. Well. Thanks for your time, sir. You have a nice day too. But it turns out Duncan's not at all alone in his anguish.

Peter Brown, from the other end of the agescale to Duncan, fancies having Keane around the place alright, but hasn't much truck with the notion that he'll be in the dug-out rather than on the pitch.

"It'll be great, we need a player like him, " he says. "But he's coming as manager, " you say.

"Listen mate, wait till he sees some of the shite he has to work with. He won't be able to help himself. They're rubbish. Just rubbish."

So Hosannah isn't exactly in excelsis around Sunderland, then. How about you, sir? Yes, you in the QUINN 9 Sunderland top. Happy that Mr Roy Keane is going to turn your boys around?

"Believe it when I see it, mate, " shrugs Colin Cale.

"It's good that he's coming, like. Hopefully he'll kick the shit out of some of those players. At least he'll care. None of them care or if they do they have a funny way of showing it. I'd say he'll stop us getting relegated alright but it's going to take years to get back near the Premiership, like.

And by then, he'll have gone to Man United, won't he?"

Janey Mac. They should start a new advertising campaign around here. Sunderland . . .

Where The Samaritans Drive Ferraris. Does nobody have anything positive to contribute?

Solace is found where it can always be relied upon. In the kind face of a little old lady looking to be helped across the street.

"Aye, well if he's good enough for Quinny, he's good enough for me, pet, " says Gladys Johnson.

"My grandson was in hospital when he gave all that money to charity. You should have heard all the nurses going on about him. He did so much good by giving all that money away. If he likes this boy Keane, then I like him too."

"This boy Keane? Haven't you heard of Roy Keane? Used to captain Man United?"

"Ah, I've heard the name alright but I never watch much football outside of Sunderland.

They're my team. No point worrying about the others, is there?"

Fair point, pet. Fair point.