THE long and winding rehabilitation of Guns 'n' Roses continues. Or rather, doesn't. The band, now whittled down to Axl Rose and A. N. others, cancelled a show earlier this month in Portland, Maine, after health-andsafety officials expressed two concerns: pyrotechnics and alcohol. It appears that after the pyro issue was resolved the band refused to go on stage without their beloved Jagermeister in attendance. A GnR spokesman blamed marshals for "making it impossible for the band to perform their show to the usual high standards that their fans deserve" and anyone who has seen them will know the efficacy of this statement. Curiously, however, reports last week indicated only 3,000 of more than 6,000 tickets had been sold for the show, a claim the band denied. Add this to the fact that it's uber-longawaited album Chinese Democracy still shows no sign of emerging, according to the band's record company.

More than Doctor Junk

JONI Mitchell is set to be conferred with an honorary degree from Trinity College Dublin's Philosophical Society. With Al Pacino in Dublin this week to accept his, Mitchell is expected to make a rare visit here in April to join an elite club that includes Archbishop Desmond Tutu, Salman Rushdie, Bob Geldof and Bertie Ahern. It is unknown whether she plans to play yet.

No sleep till kick off

ENGLISH metal heads Motorhead have agreed to sponsor an English under-10s football team. The Greenbank B team from Lincoln won the deal after the team's manager sent them an email and to his surprise received a glowing response. The boys will now have the band's motif emblazoned on their shirts and intend to take to the field to the sound of classics such as 'Ace Of Spades' and 'Bomber'. The area's other nine-year-olds must be very afraid.

Blue Wednesday

FEEDBACK has 10 pairs of tickets (yes, pairs) to give away for Paul Buchanan's second date at Dublin's Vicar Street on Wednesday. All you need to do is email (address below) the answer to the following easy question: What is the name of The Blue Nile's most recent album?

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