In ancient times, long before calendars were known to man, the people of Ireland had another way of telling time. Upon the first murmurs of Kilkenny trying to sort out their football team, the people threw a feast, for this was their new year. And so it continued, that each January the same utterances came from the place they call Nowlan Park and each time the natives rejoiced. Pretty good method, we reckon. And turns out it still works.
At the minute Kilkenny are getting ready to enter the National Football League of 2008 as the county aims to bring the sport back from Hades. It was only last year the minors picked up some wins in the Leinster League while the previous year they won their first match at that level in over 40 years. Now under Richard Windle the majority of those players have become under-21s. And next year the hope is they can compete in division four.
"It is our aim to continue the progress made at minor level and to prepare the players for a Leinster [under-21] quarter-final clash with either Wexford or Westmeath, " said Windle. "There is no reason why we cannot progress further. This group of players knows how to win football matches in Leinster." For auld lang syne, my dear. . .
If you hadn't heard it all before, you'd be inclined to believe there is some forward momentum. And Windle is clearly a young and enthusiastic coach who means the very best. But he will ultimately fail because not enough people in the county have enough pride and no matter how many Liam McCarthys are brought home, it can't hide the fact that there are too many quitters and too many excuses in a place supposedly full of champions.
If you can't win, don't try.
But you still can't beat us at hurling.
It's driven a lot of good people from the game. In November, Dick Mullins, a Laois man who's devoted years to a hopeless cause realised just that.
This time last year he stood on the sideline as Offaly put his side out of the O'Byrne Cup by 25 points to two. But still he went on. A couple of weeks later they were beaten 6-16 to 1-7 by DIT. But still he went on. In April he couldn't get a panel for training because the club hurling championship was in motion. But still he went on. In May, his side were dumped out of the Leinster Junior Championship as they are every other year. But still he went on. By November he could go on no more and he and his management team didn't seek re-election.
By December the county had to withdraw from an O'Byrne Cup game against Dundalk IT because, despite having a panel of players, they couldn't find a manager. If it happened the under-10s in your local club, there would be serious questions asked.
But in Kilkenny there are no questions at all. No wondering why for all their talk, a county with over 80,000 people can't field a team that can compete with the worst out there. Instead there are excuses. Firstly they'll tell you the number of club football matches played in the county last year, a figure over 400.
Then they'll ask you how many hurling matches were played in Leitrim and Tyrone and Fermanagh and Monaghan. But they are missing the point.
Leitrim and Tyrone and Fermanagh and Monaghan all field county teams in league and championship, despite their numbers. Meanwhile Kilkenny stand pointing with their trousers draped firmly around their ankles. Betterpull them up lads, yis might catch a cold.
It's not so long since Nickey Brennan made that very point. "You can say that there are double standards at work and that other counties are allowed to pay lip service to hurling while Kilkenny are taking the rap for doing the same with football. But Kilkenny's neglect sticks out like a sore thumb. At the end of the day they are not taking part in inter-county football.
And they are getting away with it."
A former manager of the county's footballers, Brennan addressed the problem, but the reasons behind it are rarely unearthed.
You see, there are some vital things missing in Kilkenny, and no matter what they say, don't believe for a second it's footballing talent or tradition. They'd be the first people to tell you that hurling is a beautiful game and that football is for block-headed yokels who can't master its genius.
By their very own logic, how hard can it be to grab onto the bottom rung? But what they don't have is a schedule that allows football even the smallest breath. They don't have a board that's willing to see how badly all this reflects on them.
And they don't have players who have pride in wearing a Kilkenny football jersey. The basic problems are apathy and ignorance.
There's a football board in place who are afraid to make a noise in case they wake their parents up. Last year there wasn't a minor championship game played in the county.
The 2006 under-21 championship started the week before Christmas. And while the rest of the country struggled to fulfil its senior club fixtures, Kilkenny somehow found a solution. Despite their championship involving both group and knock-out stages the whole thing had been beaten out the door by May.
There was no football thereafter and it left Mullins in an impossible situation. He became unable to assemble a panel for training from April onwards because, despite having numbers earlier in the year, most of his 26-man squad were club hurlers who were willing to desert when the time came.
The Leinster Council haven't exactly helped Kilkenny's cause all that much in recent years either. They refuse to complain about Kilkenny because they technically participate in all of their competitions but they've done little to help silence the laughter Kilkenny football creates. Because of an open draw system, last year they faced Meath in the opening round of the junior championship. This was the Meath team that was beaten by Cork in the previous year's final by a single point, allowing their players to give it another go at that level. While in the past seven years, they've drawn Meath, Dublin and Kildare, each on two occasions.
The Leinster Minor League - a competition that gave them such hope thanks to a couple of wins last season - was this year scrapped and the championship wasn't seeded either, leaving Kilkenny to face Laois.
All this has overtones of the 98-99 league which saw Kilkenny shunned from senior football. That year, as the league was revamped, they were placed in a group with Kerry, among others, told scoring difference would decide positions, and were embarrassed seven times.
They ran and never came back.
"Should Kilkenny field a senior football team?" asks Liam Griffin, a former member of the Hurling Development Committee. "I suppose in principle they should field a football team. They should give fellas the opportunity but there just doesn't seem to be the will or the desire. That strikes me as the biggest problem. Other counties look at it and say it gives them an advantage in hurling as well.
They don't have guys having to choose one sport or the other, problems the likes of Redmond Barry, Conal Keaney and Neville Coughlan have.
"But when I was on the HDC, we came up with the system where there was the Rackard and Ring cups. If there was that in football, counties who aspire to win could compete at their own level. But the thing is, Kilkenny have as good as chance of winning a football All Ireland as at least 20 counties and they've no team. That's why I think football needs three tiers as well. In football the promotion and relegation would work much better.
Because having got to a certain standard it is not that difficult to jump to the next level and to be at least competitive. If any code is screaming out for three tiers, football is, and I think we will see that.
"Especially because you'll see more and more players losing at inter-county level.
The incentives and holidays and whatever for the best team are there like never before. That will drive the best on so you'll see the rich getting richer, the poor getting poorer, and something will have to be done. Because everyone needs reward.
When my club won a junior football championship the place went crazy like we had won four All Irelands. That's what it means to counties.
What's wrong with winning at your own level?"
But any such initiative is still in the distance and shouldn't serve as an excuse for Kilkenny to neglect football any longer. No more excuses, no more exclusion.
CATS AND THE BIG BALL N1 All Ireland Senior Football Championships: None Leinster Senior Football Championships: 3 (1888, 1900, 1911) National Football Leagues: None All Ireland under-21 Football Championships: None Leinster under-21 Football Championships: None All Ireland Minor Football Championships: None Leinster Minor Football Championships: None All Ireland Junior Football Championships: None Leinster Junior Football Championships: None Last championship win 1929: Kilkenny 0-10, Louth 0-4 Closest call since 1961: Kildare 3-8, Kilkenny 3-4 Some hurlers that lined out for the footballers: Paddy Buggy, DJ Carey, Henry Shef"in, Eddie Keher, Jim Langton, Lory Meagher, Paddy Phelan
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