NOT many men grant their mistress permission to have a baby. Usually, pregnancy in extra-marital affairs is accidental or the man has been 'tricked'.

But if Hugh Orde has been unconventional in his policing career, why would his private life be different? The North's Chief Constable gave the female detective with whom he had been having a three-year-affair his blessing to conceive a child. The result is a 16-month-old son whom Orde has seen. He remains married to Kathleen, his wife of 22 years.

The most common reaction is, 'where does he find the time?' Orde holds the most challenging policing job in Europe, works 14-hour days, lives with Kathleen and their student son, and regularly trains for marathons. He's the first Chief Constable unanimously liked across the sectarian divide - no unionist or nationalist politician spoken to by the Sunday Tribune had a bad word for him, and, until now, there seemed to be no chink in his armour.

He's fiercely ambitious. His Police Service of Northern Ireland (PSNI) contract expires in September and he was tipped to succeed Ian Blair as head of London's Metropolitan Police. But has he ruined his chances? "He's an excellent cop and I wouldn't lambast him over personal stuff but, at the back of your mind, you wonder if a man who lies to his missus and kid is suitable for a job which demands rigorous honesty", said a unionist politician.

On balance, Orde's immense abilities should guarantee no repercussions. His affair was with a 41-year-old London detective, not a young, vulnerable Monica Lewinsky-type employee. Neither were there any Clintonesque denials.

He admitted the affair but said it was a private matter.

Before the News of the World story appeared, Assistant Chief Constable Peter Sheridan rang key politicians on the Policing Board to warn them of what was coming. He stressed Orde's work hadn't been affected, and protecting PSNI dignity was vital. The approach succeeded. Even the DUP didn't denounce Orde, much to grassroots' chagrin.

Some women find Orde flirtatious, but he's certainly not a ladies' man. He didn't reciprocate the affection of an attractive blonde PSNI employee, although her interest was "more to do with the pips on his shoulder than the size of his truncheon", a colleague confides. Orde met his lover, a divorcee with a six-year-old daughter, when she joined the Stevens team investigating police and loyalist collusion. They sparked and soon became inseparable, even training together.

It was a serious relationship, not a fling, although those who know Orde and his wife say theirs isn't a dead marriage.

They often dine in smart restaurants near their north Co Down home. "Kathleen takes the mickey out of him. At one social function, she said she was going to join Hugh jogging but wasn't impressed with his style. 'He runs like a big fairy, ' she joked. She's a nice woman but not a yummy mummy."

Orde's hardly a looker himself. "He's like a fit Bing Crosby, " says a woman who knows him. "But he carries himself well. He's supremely confident without being arrogant. Hugh Orde is very comfortable being Hugh Orde."

Born in the Home Counties, he lived with a great uncle after his parents separated. A farming career beckoned but Orde had other ideas and joined the Met. During his meteoric rise to deputy assistant commissioner at just 41, he spent time policing Brixton, developing his interest in community relations.

Taking over the day-to-day running of the Stevens inquiry into collusion, he was unsettled by what he found. His appointment as the North's chief constable put him in charge of officers he had probed. Many of the old guard chose early retirement. As an outsider with no collusion baggage, the SDLP embraced Orde.

He appointed Sinead McSweeney, who had previously worked for Michael McDowell, as his head of media and PR. "Hiring a young Cork woman called Sinead was a bold move when he was already suspect in unionist eyes, " says an insider.

"Hugh Orde wasn't my first choice for chief constable, " admits DUP MP and ex-policing board member Sammy Wilson. "I'd have preferred someone from PSNI ranks, providing they weren't an absolute plonker.

"But I must say, Orde has pleasantly surprised me. He can be light on policing detail but he's hugely committed. I watched him at the Twelfth parade in Belfast talking to ordinary people, having a bit of craic, and he impressed me."

That's typical of Orde's hands-on approach.

Working until midnight, he'll phone the PSNI press office at 7am to find out how it's handling the morning news. "He'll ring police stations and departments with a brisk, 'this is Orde', " says a colleague. "It's never 'this is Hugh Orde', let alone 'this is the chief constable'. He has no airs and graces, which is refreshing in an organisation where hierarchy is everything."

He has a quirky sense of humour.

His unorthodox approach surfaced when he offered to address the Sinn FAcopyrightin A rdfheis on policing. A potentially controversial decision was giving ex-IRA prisoner and writer Anthony McIntyre an interview three years ago. "I regard him as a political opponent, " says McIntyre, "but I like him very much. He had an affair, but I can think of plenty of senior cops who have committed crimes here.

Hugh Orde is guilty of nothing."

As chief constable, he has an open-door policy. "He's always available and he'll listen to any reasoned argument, " says a nationalist. He's very pointed in his analysis. He doesn't pussyfoot about. He'll just say 'that stacks up' or 'that doesn't stack up'."

Conversations with him are fast-moving.

"His mind bounces about, " says a colleague. "He's impatient if you're not working at his speed. He'll know what you're saying before you're finished and he'll interrupt." But another colleague questions Orde's reputation for straight-talking: "He's very good at chatting away, giving the impression of delivering a frank answer, but actually saying nothing."

Despite his sociable nature, associates speak of "a shield you can't penetrate - it's the detachment of the long-distance runner". There are unproven rumours of a previous affair with a Northern woman he met through work. His plans for his baby son and current relationship with his mistress remain unknown. Orde visits Dublin to watch the rugby and is a big Bruce Springsteen fan. "That's the radical, independent side of him, " says a friend.

Let's not get carried away. Orde's police force might be an improvement, but it's far from squeaky clean. At Sean Hoey's Omagh bomb trial, police lies were uncovered. Most recent paramilitary murders remain unsolved and the PSNI is useless at dealing with anti-social activity.

There's much more to tackle Orde about than his extra-marital activities.

C.V.

Occupation: the North's Chief Constable
Born: 1959, Surrey, England
Married to: Kathleen, they have a son Jonathan (21) In the news because: of the revelation that he had an affair with a London police detective, which resulted in a baby son