Dodgy horror spin-off with plenty of gore and tenuous historical connections that brings us from 1949 Cairo to a muddled storyline about a Byzantine Christian church in Kenya. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Hardball (2001)
Today, TV3, 9.30pm

Cornier than corn flick starring Keanu 'Wooden' Reeves as a good-for-nothing tout who somehow ends up coaching a Little League team. Think Dangerous Minds meets A League Of Their Own.

The French Connection (1971)
Today, RTE One, 1.05am

Classic '70s New York cop drama starring Gene Hackman and Fernando Rey as two policemen who uncover an international drug smuggling ring.

American Pie (1999)
Friday, TV3, 9pm

Crude but funny depiction of drunken and sexually frustrated American high school life, starring Jason Biggs, Chris Klein and Tara Reid.

Anger Management (2003)
Friday, RTE Two, 9.30pm

Awful messy film featuring Jack Nicholson and kiss of death Adam Sandler. When Sandler gets misdiagnosed as having issues with rage, he is assigned under a buddy system to Jack Nicholson who, it turns out, is nuts.