Irish People
16 June 1900

Well-to-do sons of Irish judges, ill-to-do sons of Irish bankrupt landlords, fools and restless youths of all classes . . . small in number and unrepresentative in character, we are glad to say . . . "volunteered" to go to South Africa and fight for the tyrants who are wronging and robbing their own wretched country . . . to fight under the flag that has ever been a symbol of woe to Ireland . . . against the grand and valorous race who are defending to the very death their homes and their liberties against the outrage of the big, mean Despoiler.

They went forth as allies of the abominable horde whose doings were told of by M.

Davitt in Monday's Freeman's Journal to the horror of all Ireland and the world. They set out to aid the vilest cause that ever was supported by arms in the field. They were participators in a crime as base as ever disgraced the bloody annals of warfare.

And they choose their course of their own volition.

It can be said for the Dublin Fusiliers, the Connacht Rangers, the kidnapped militiamen, and the other unfortunate victims of Rhodes and Chamberlain that they had bound themselves to England. But no excuse whatever can be offered for the miserable crowd of 'Volunteers' . . . the idle sons of 'The English Garrison in Ireland' . . . who started off amidst the drunken howls of Trinity College students at Kingstown, avowing their determination to "pull old Kruger's whiskers, " only to find themselves prisoners a few moments after they accidentally came within Mauser shot of the first little party of Boer farmers who crossed their path. The Irish people will waste no sympathy on them. They do not deserve it. We may feel some pity for the fathers and mothers and wives of the mere Irish regiments of the line. But it is to the Boer warriors, aged women, and children that our hearts go out. They are the victims of this villainous campaign of robbery, incendiarism, murder and unbridled lust.

Theirs is all the heroism, theirs all the credit of this long struggle which has not yet drawn to a close . . . and which may not be ended until some great Power, for very shame, sheds the mask of selfishness, and cries, "Hold! Enough!" in tones of thunder in the ears of the brutal British Empire.

Kilkenny Journal
17 June 1857

The Umbrellometer . . . We think the umbrella can be taken as a very good test of a person's character. The man who always takes an umbrella out with him is a cautious fellow, who abstains from all speculation and is pretty sure to die rich. The man who is always leaving his umbrella behind him, is generally one who makes no provision for the morrow. He is reckless, thoughtless, always late for the train, leaves the street door open when he goes home late at night, and absent to such a degree as to speak ill of a baby in front of its mamma.

The man who is always losing his umbrella is an unlucky dog, whose bills are always protested, whose boots split, whose gloves crack, whose buttons are always coming off, whose "change" is sure to have some bad money in it. Be cautious how you lend a thousand pounds to such a man! The man who is perpetually expressing a nervous anxiety about his umbrella, and wondering if it is safe, is full of meanness and low suspicions, and whom it is best not to play at cards, nor drink a bottle of wine. He is sure to suspect you are cheating him, or that you are drinking more than your share. . . .