IT'S a crying shame Sculpting Life: The Work of Rowan Gillespie was scheduled first at 11.35pm, then moved to the even later slot of 12.05am because of Father of the Bride II. Not even Father of the Bride I. Or even the Spencer Tracy version.
There was, allegedly, a disagreement between the writer/director Tom Burke and producer/ director Shane Brennan, which Burke went into in a long email. Burke's name was (let's assume accidentally) missing from the original press release, which RTE says it has since rectified. Whatever problems they may have had, they still moulded a respectable three-dimensional . . . if not a quieter, more contemplative . . .portrait of the sculptor at work.
Gillespie discussed several works, including James Joyce, WB Yeats and the haunting, bony figures of 'Famine'. With his figures he wanted to show the physical hardship. He said the reality is obscured by propaganda and ballads. There was little insight into his early life, except Gillespie was influenced by Edward Munch . . .he of 'The Scream' . . . during his time in Norway. Gillespie told a harrowing story that inspired one 'Famine' sculpture: about a man who walked 10 miles to a soup kitchen in Clifden and home again three days in a row in vain, carrying his daughter.
On that third day, still with no soup, the man didn't realise his daughter was already dead.
This was a rare insight into a private artist but there were too many friends, patrons, art collectors giving their tuppence worth. Roger Kohn declared, "What he got from Norway was angst." This sounded more like teachers giving a school report on parents' day. Frances Ruane added, "The figures have a dignity." But Norma Smurfit's observation was the most revealing: "After 10 years, no one has ever touched them." No graffiti. No knickers on their heads. No bicycle chains locked to them. On Custom House Quay, he has done the impossible . . . created something for which people have respect.
While we're not on the subject of respect, if Celebrity You're A Star was Stars in Your Eyes, Brendan Courtney would have said, "Tonight, Matthew, I'm going to be my worst nightmare!" Walking down O'Connell Street naked might be marginally worse. On Sunday's show he "sang" Smokey Robinson's 'Tears of a Clown'.
He also did a bendy knee, twostep dance in a pair of tight white jeans.
It was horrific and he buckled under this realisation halfway through. He did have the decency not to invoke his charity as the reason he was doing this. It's called You're A Star. That's what attracts contestants, like flies to glittery flypaper.
But then Courtney croaked, "Just like Linda Martin did, I tried to keep my sadness in, smiling in the public eyef" That was a cheap shot, considering she was fired from the show and he shouldn't be slagging off anyone in his state. (Martin is a big loss. She was also the only judge who was an industry veteran and, besides Brendan O'Connor, wouldn't tell people they can sing just because she might know them. ) But the bad karma flew around the Helix like a golden snitch and hit Courtney square in the keester.
Brian McFadden said, "Work on the vocals." Amanda Brunker said, "Booty-licious!" (She also told Vivienne Connolly the night before, "I hear somethingf a record contract." Perhaps, she heard it in a music producer's briefcase as he hurried in the opposite direction, desperately trying to hail a taxi away. ) I'm disappointed Brunker decided to miscast herself as Little Miss Nice, avoiding any deliciously bitchy comments . . . but still managing to laugh at O'Connor's. O'Connor told Courtney, "That was brutal."
That, for once, was an understatement.
At least it was until Sean Ban Breathnach sang 'Where's Your Mama Gone?' "Chirpa! Chirpa! Cheep! Cheep!" He even did chicken wings with his elbows.
He revelled in his awfulness, which makes him a bad sport, not a good one. The rest were, at least, trying.
Nuala Carey was told to inject more sexuality into 'I Will Survive'. She replied, "Oh, I wouldn't be able for that, " her voice dripping with sweet sarcasm as she glared politely at the judges through her false eyelashes. While the contestants had trouble singing, poor host Brian Ormond had trouble speaking, falling over his words all over the gaff. (He was flubtastic! ).
By the end of this humiliating pantomime of awfulness, they'll all be wishing, like Courtney, that RTE had given this the graveyard slot too.
Reviewed Sculpting Life: The Work of Rowan Gillespie
Channel 4
Celebrity
You're A Star
RTE
One
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