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Altar ego shows class at Limerick's "nest hour
On the Air Pat Nugent



TOULOUSE v LIVERPOOL
Setanta Sports 1, Wednesday
MATCH OF THE DAY BBC1, Wednesday
ORANGE PLAYLIST ITV, Thursday

QUOTE of the week by a long shot goes to RTE Radio's pitchside reporter Martin Kiely last Sunday for the Waterford v Limerick All Ireland hurling semi-final. As Deise heads fell at the final whistle and green-flecked euphoria broke out around him, he managed to grab Brian Begley, stick a microphone in front of him and say, "I served mass the day your mother and father got married, a great day for Limerick?"

Thankfully Begley understood the great day being referred to was the game, rather than the day his parents sealed the deal, and answered accordingly.

Kiely is just one of the many able hands on RTE Radio's GAA coverage and has an excellent knack of collaring selectors at half-time and asking them pertinent questions, frequently analysing tactics or the game's shape, that put RTE Television's touchline reporters to shame.

Well, we'd better enjoy the radio lads while we can, there are only three more days this season for Micheal and the rest to strut their stuff before the summer will be gone (if it was ever here).

Setanta are looking forward to the winter though, they've been telling whoever will listen for weeks now about all the exciting soccer action they've secured the rights to. Looking at their midweek coverage of Toulouse v Liverpool in the Champions League qualifiers though it seems that most of the money went on bagging those bragging rights.

Commentator Martin Fisher and Dean Saunders may well have been basking in the French sun, but it sounded suspiciously like they were in a cupboard underneath some stairs. As the game started Fisher wittered away for a while and there was no sound from Saunders until he exclaimed, "I can't hear you either, " and various ghostly voices and whispers continued to drift in and out of the commentary for the first 10 minutes. They didn't even bother showing us the Toulouse team before the game, and while they could be pretty confident that the vast majority of people tuning in weren't too bothered, it was the kind of obvious bias that even Martin Kiely would struggle to get away with.

When his microphone difficulties had been ironed out Saunders still didn't exactly seem to grasp his job description. As Liverpool defended a corner with their usual zonal marking approach, Saunders expressed his dislike for the tactic. "There are too many grey areas there for me but who I am to say?" Might as well turn the mic off again so Dean. To their credit though Setanta don't go in for the Skyesque hyping of rubbish games and see no reason to call a spade anything other than a shovel. After Fisher and Saunders got into one lengthy digression on injuries, Fisher caught himself and chuckled, "You can tell it's 0-0 when we start talking about metatarsals and hernias."

Indeed. The first half could have bored a hole in a wall and by the time we reached the break Fisher seemed more than delighted to pass the buck and see if anyone else could find something interesting to say about it. "And now back to the studio to get the thoughts of Macca and Spackers." The thoughts of Macca and Spackers (Steve McManaman and Nigel Spackman to their friends) basically amounted to agreeing that the whole affair was horribly dull. Still it'd be entertaining if this nickname policy stays in vogue. We could have Bill O'Herlihy introduce Champions League nights by saying, "I'm joined tonight in the studio by Gilesy, Chippy and Gobby the house-elf, but first let's go pitchside where Georgie Boy is talking to Ray H. Word."

Setanta are still relative toddlers in this game though and presumably will be gradually knocking edges off their coverage as the season progresses, but Match of the Day has age on its side. As highlights shows go it still sets the standards in every respect, although if Gary Lineker gets any smarmier they'll have to move the studio to Copper Face Jacks. The Old Boy's Club mentality can grate too, particularly when Lineker and Alan Hansen joshed each other over a few clips showing how Kasper Schmeichel was so hilariously similar to his dad, and their old chum, Peter. And of course Lineker couldn't resist signing off with one of his mauvais mots, "United dropped two points and Ronaldo went nuts." Groan.

Rio Ferdinand turned up on Orange Playlist to picks the songs that define his life. In between tracks Ferdinand was surprisingly engaging, including relating how his first ever away trip with Manchester United was on Easyjet (bet Roy Keane didn't like that) and how a group of fans spent the duration of the journey throwing things at him while he tried to pretend he was asleep or listening to his iPod. But despite tales of starting up his own record label, Ferdinand stuck stubbornly to the footballer's stereotype of having absolutely dreadful taste in music, choosing utter pap like D'Angelo, Ne-Yo and Maroon 5.

Better stick to the soccer Rio, can't see that record label taking off.




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