MONDAY

They have a different way of dealing with white-collar crime in the US. Here people in well-cut suits who perpetrate frauds usually never do "the perp walk". Across the pond, their judges call people such as Bernie Madoff "extraordinarily evil" and sentence them to 150 years in prison, even at the age of 71.

They don't see white-collar crime as victimless because they know that when a man builds a $65bn pyramid scheme and, day after day for 15 years, prepares hundreds of thousands of fake documents and legal statements, and it crashes down, people get hurt and the most vulnerable get hurt most of all. And they don't see the anger of victims as that of a braying mob looking for blood. Instead, like New York judge Denny Chin, who rejects Madoff's appeals for leniency, they acknowledge that the victims "are doing what they are supposed to be doing, which is putting their faith in justice". Americans don't get irony, and we mock them knowingly when they appear so naïve. But surely the joke is on us. Our cynicism is born of the fact that our bad guys in suits never wear handcuffs for bracelets because they so rarely get to court in the first place.

Murray Mania hits the roof at Wimbledon as the €100m retractable rainproof roof makes its debut, upstaged only by the absolute belter taking place on the grass below between 'homeboy' Scot Andy Murray and Swiss Stanislas Wawrinka. Only at Wimbledon can the effortless mechanics of an expanding roof turn an open-air tournament traditionally reserved for posh toffs into a high-octane potboiler which, under the heat of the lights, sees solidly stiff upper lips melt and fists pump. Democracy at play at last on the centre court? In the words of the great, late commentator Dan Maskell: Ooh, I say.

tuesDAY

Midnight passes and US troops leave Baghdad, with Iraq policed for the first time in six years by its own 600,000-strong (American-trained) security forces. The Us troops' withdrawal to their bases in the countryside is celebrated as a day of national victory. Total withdrawal is not until 2011 but even though extreme sectarian violence has left hundreds dead this year in car bombs, Iraq finally closes a chapter on one of the most bloody periods of its history and begins a new story – this time one in which hopefully, its own people will have a say.

Iraq and humour don't go together in quite the same way that Michael Jackson's death seems to have inspired a stream of online one-liners. It brings to mind that joke by Iranian stand-up comedian Shappi Khorsand, who has performed here at the Cat Laughs festival. Americans are always confused between Iraq and Iran, she says, even though 4,323 US troops have died in Iraq since 2003. Whenever she goes through customs she has to remind them she's from Iran, not Iraq: "WE'RE the ones with the weapons of mass destruction."

wednesDAY

Statistics threaten to overwhelm us. There are now 413,500 people on the live register, 11,400 up on May and 197,781 more than this time last year, a rate of 11.9% and the second-highest in the eurozone bar Spain. ICTU general secretary David Begg says we need to "get our heads around" this "mega crisis"and treat it with the same urgency as the banking crisis. Brian Cowen is sorry that so many people are losing their jobs and warns that half a million could be in the same boat by December. But the political debate is about whether the rate of increase is falling or not. Their concern is breathtaking.

No roof today, but more stats from the capital of tennis where Murray becomes only the fourth British man since WWII to reach the last four at Wimbledon and takes another step towards becoming the first male British winner for 73 years. If or when he loses, will it be a case of out damn'd Scot?

thursDAY

Summertime, and 15 days' worth of rainfall drops itself over Dublin in one hour, leaving homes flooded, the Mater Hospital's A&E closed, roofs collapsing, trains cancelled and roads as wet as swimming pools. Why can't they just clear the drains?

friDAY

We can barely contain ourselves any longer, it seems. Swine flu is so rampant – over a million cases in the US, as many as 100,000 a day in Britain by August – that we can no longer hope to prevent its spread. We've had 63 cases here, but the projected rise is exponential: we could see 100,000 a week by the autumn. So stop worrying whether every sneeze, ache and pain is a H1N1 moment – it probably will be. Time to stockpile the paracetamol and pray for an early vaccine.

Whatsisname the Scot's out of Wimbledon, damn him…