We'd really like to see Michael's casino plans.

It's not so much the idea of Michael Flatley building a casino that surprises us. It's the description of the proposal in the Enquirer that has us intrigued. They say it's a "Jurassic, Irish-themed casino, located between the Frontier and the Stardust." An Irish themed casino? Well, MIchael has demonstrated admirable good taste in the renovation of his Cork home.

But does "Irish themed" mean leprechauns and pots of gold and lucky shamrocks all that kind of stuff? Or does it mean, that unlike other casinos in the area, MIchael's place will allow you bet on the 8.30 at Shelbourne Park?


Stars tell Hallowe'en stories about hauntings.

Hugh Grant, Keanu Reeves, Renee Zellweger, Robbie Williams and Sting. Just a few of the stars who confess to having seen ghosts over the years. Jordan is another. She tells New! that she's hoping she has escaped the mad monk who haunted her home in East Sussex. She and her son Harvey recently moved and, she says, so far there has been no sign of the stooped old man who walks through walls. Tara PalmerTompkinson claims she can see ghosts which look like "semi-transparent holograms". Or maybe, what she's actually seeing are, er, semi-transparent holograms.

More exposure of the stars who suffer with cellulite.

It's all a bit unfair really, what with long lens cameras and all that kind of thing. But Star has gone to a lot of trouble to dig out photographs, which should actually be called fatographs, of stars with dodgy upper legs. Britney Spears is rather wrinkly around the thighs as is Charlotte Church, Charlie Brooks and Patsy Palmer.

J.Lo, surprisingly, is shown with the dreaded orange-peel.

They even have fatographs of Posh Spice with lumpy thighs. Can you just imagine her reaction when she sees the pictures? She probably doesn't know she has it.

David will of course tell her.

Heat readers have gone right off Brian McFadden.

Sarah in Southampton says:

"Not content with changing his hair, his weight and his music, now he wants to change his wife." Kirsty, by email, says she feel sorry for Kerry and thinks she's a down-to-earth woman with a wonderful personality and a great sense of humour. Ria Jones in Dinbych says: "No doubt Brian McFadden thinks being single goes with his new solo image . . . but the guy is a fool if he thinks he'll become a babe magnet just because he dumped Kerry."

Lindsey in Cumbria tells Brian "to wake up and realise what a massive mistake he's making."

Sampling the genius of Peter Kay.

Some of the questions Peter asks: "If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat? Why is there a light in the fridge and none in the freezer? Why can't women put on mascara with their mouths closed?" And some of the best lines from his stand-up show: "My Dad always used to say: 'Fight "re with "re" which is probably why he was thrown out of the "re brigade." "When I was a kid I used to pray every day for a new bike. Then I realised the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked him to forgive me." "You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither."

Sterling and Euro and ripoffs and all.

The new Irish mag Prudence knows a thing or two. It tells us that it knows "you're price aware but enjoy spending money. We know you like the high-life, weekends away with the girls, romantic dinners with your lover, cocktails on a Friday night, Sunday lunch with family and holidays to recover from it all." Could be right. Prudence went off to Belfast to see if there was money to be saved shopping there. And it came to conclusion there wasn't.

(About 4 on a 144 bill - not including 50 train fare. ) Prudence by the way, sells for 2.95. Or, er, £2 Sterling in Northern Ireland.