Michael O' Leary

All right all right, we fully understand that Brian Cowen has a lot on his plate at the moment, but what was The Cowenator thinking, however, when he dispatched Donegal catch Mary Coughlan off to haggle for 300 potential jobs in Dublin Airport with Michael O'Leary? The latter, lest we forget, is as utterly merciless as bullying, publicity-devouring Westmeath straight shooters come, while the former has made wanton incoherence her forte in a daring bid to become the most rubbish Tánaiste since, well, Mary Harney. As blind dates go, we hear it was a doozy. The resulting PR disaster leaves us in a state of complete and utter despair – primarily because nobody had the presence of mind to film the bloody thing, thus denying us the greatest slice of potentially You-Tube-able genius since O'Leary bitch-slapped Deco Ganley on Prime Time last September. When (oh when) will Mad Mick finally land the TV starring vehicle he's clearly been born to front? Rumour suggests that he's already passed on everything from The Apprentice to Dragon's Den. What about an animated show for little kids? Think Bob The Builder with bigger bollocks.