Michael Palin went around the world in 80 days. Sarah Palin did it in as many hours. And there was a touch of the Monty Pythons about her 78-hour whirlwind tour of New York that took in a fistful of world leaders, a few dozen fire fighters and as many midtown Manhattan hotel suites.

Palin's dance card was full as she embarked on a three-day foreign-policy boot camp that kicked off with a meeting with Afghan president Hamid Karzai.

Her debut on the international stage almost sparked a press mutiny when Palin spokeswoman Susan Schmidt informed reporters an agreement to allow a pool reporter in along with a cameraman had been pulled. It would be a pictures-and-no-sound event, she said.

For the press, already chafing against the iron cordon Palin's handlers have thrown around her, this was a Bridge to Nowhere too far. CNN, which was providing pool footage, refused to film the meeting and after a cold war-style stand off Palin relented. A pool reporter would be allowed in for 30 seconds – 29 as it transpired. It was, however, long enough to capture an exchange between Palin and Karzai during which the Afghan president explained his son Mirwais' name meant 'light of the house'. Palin didn't need to explain what her son's name meant. Track, named after a running track, is rather more self-explanatory. "Oh, nice," she responded and fluttered her hand against her chest in one of the beauty queen tics she has retained from her days as the runner-up Miss Alaska. History books, take note.

Next up was foreign affairs heavyweight Henry Kissin­ger. Palin sat primly while he instructed her how to sort out Iran and put China back in its box. Would that it were so easy.

She rewarded Kissinger with a kiss before implying during an interview with CBS anchor Katie Couric that, frankly, Kissinger was naïve when it came to dealing with Iran. Ah, how far she has come. And how fast.

From the meetings that followed, it was pretty easy to spot who owed the Bush administration a few favours; Colombian president Alvar Uribe, Georgian president Mikheil Saakashvilli, Ukrainian president Viktor Yush­chenko, Iraqi president Jalal Talabani and Pakistani president Asif Ali Zardari.

Whatever her weaknesses on the substance of foreign policy, Palin has an undeniable charisma and, had French first lady Carla Bruni not provided some pretty stiff competition, she might well have been pronounced the belle of the UN ball. "You are even more gorgeous than you are on the TV," Pakistani president Asif Ali Zardari gushed.

"You are so nice. Thank you," Palin replied coyly batting her eyelids and rewarding him with that Palin pout.

After his handler suggested another handshake for the camera, Benazir Bhutto's husband turned on a scarily lascivious grin. "I might hug," he said. Even Bill Clinton, with Hillary safely out of the way in Washington, pronounced himself impressed by Palin.

The only person less than bowled over by the Palin phenomenon was Bono. The singer, who had arranged a meeting with McCain to discuss One's agenda of fighting Aids and global poverty long before Palin was a twinkle in the Republican candidate's eye, was not pleased by Palin's campaign spin that she had "even penciled in some time for Bono".

The One campaign fired off a coolly worded missive, clarifying that it was McCain who had requested Palin's attendance at the meeting, which was promptly downgraded to a quick telephone call due to 'scheduling conflicts'. The Palin line of 'so many world leaders, so little time' wasn't entirely convincing. Bono, it seems, wasn't up for playing an extra on the Sarah Show.

Unfortunately for Palin, after the foreign policy crash course came the test. And Katie Couric proved a stern examiner. Pressed on why her location enhanced her foreign policy experience, a clearly rattled Palin explained: "When Russian prime minister Vladimir Putin rears his head and comes into the airspace of the United States of America, where do they go? It's Alaska. It's just right over the border. It is from Alaska that we send those out to make sure that an eye is being kept on this very powerful nation, Russia, because they are right there, they are right next to our state."

Glad we got that cleared up.

She also announced that the US has achieved 'victory' in the war in Iraq. After three short days in New York, Palin achieved the impossible; she made George W Bush look like Thomas Jefferson.