Giving a totally new meaning to the phrase 'cat burglar'

Burglars in Germany had a lucky escape unbeknownst to them when they stole a circus van in Wuppertal without realising that there was a lion asleep in the back. The van was then crashed into a sign post with the burglars fleeing, before it was towed to a depot. The lion, Caesar, was only recovered when his tamer came to claim him. A spokesman for the circus said that there was no signage on the van that it contained 'dangerous cargo'. Caesar is reported to be unruffled by the adventure.

It's official - the Brits are the ugliest people on earth

British people have been labelled amongst the ugliest in the world by an elite dating agency that only allows attractive people to join. Swedish men polled as the most good-looking, while those in Norway topped the women's poll.

Bunny & Hedges? Carrots No1? John Player Poo?

Customs in Spain have seized over €1.3m worth of counterfeit cigarettes due to be sold on to holiday makers in the Canary Islands after a British smoker found them to have a suspicious smell. Officials discovered the cigarettes from China were in fact made not of tobacco but of rabbit poo.

Jersey bin men find old lady's rings

Garbage workers managed to sift through 10 tonnes of rubbish to find a wedding and engagement ring thrown out by mistake by the husband of Bridget Pericolo (77) from New Jersey.